Tag Archives: career

Close your eyes and make a wish

I don’t know why I titled my post this way.

Mostly because I was too busy trying to dictate “hm what should I write, what would look best to any agents that may peruse my blog in order to determine my worthiness”

Eh, how about honesty.

So I said to myself “just close your eyes and… make a wish!” I meant to say “write” but oh well.

Ok, I’ll do that. No I won’t. I’m done wishing. I’m here to DO, now, and what I do is write, and massage, and live, and try to love others the best I can, and I act, and I do improvisational comedy, and what is one of the number one rules of improv?

Just jump out there and fucking do it. Just fucking SAY it. What are you doing? Fucking SAY it! Tell the audience where you are, what you’re doing, who you and your partner are to each other. Don’t leave us guessing, don’t make us wonder. Just fucking SAY IT. (In the words of our artistic director).

That’s a wonderful approach to life itself, and all the relationship paradigms within our realities. Just fucking say it. I took that approach recently with someone I am very close with and felt myself losing them. Time will tell. But it feels good to just fucking SAY IT.

We’ve been ruined by sitcom-culture. Short attention spans, unwitty humor, only follow small plot lines, won’t get to the point, pussyfoot around the tough parts, always expect a pleasant outcome but never make the effort to get there, and if it lasts more than 22 minutes we’re done with it.

It ruins relationships, because it gives us unrealistic expectations. Boy always gets the girl, siblings always fight, best friends always stay best friends (unless the plot makes them better enemies), parents always argue, lovers never argue or always get over their argument quickly (within 22 minutes, in fact).

It gives people unrealistic expectations of their fellow humans here on earth. It makes people lump together “good advice” as to how things “Are” or “should be” and pass it around social media like a fucking virus. None more so than in the relationship category.

“If things are meant to be, they’ll find a way”

“If someone really wants to spend time with you, they’ll make time, no matter how busy they are”

“A real man/woman will never break your heart”

There are so many more, but the fact is, all this good-intentioned “advice” is PURELY EGOTISTICAL.

It is the advice of one person who lost out on what they thought something SHOULD BE, and decided to tell others that if theirs WASN’T what it SHOULD BE, it wasn’t meant to be at all.

So if he doesn’t spend a lot of time with me and he’s very busy and his awkward self sometimes says things he doesn’t realize hurts my feelings and rarely texts back means, according to typical relationship advice (that I avoid at all costs) that he doesn’t love me, doesn’t care about me, nothing is real, it won’t grow, it’s not meant to be. Because if it was, he wouldn’t say hurtful things, he wouldn’t work, he’d spend all his time and money on me, and it’ll happen magically with little to no effort on anyone’s parts.

Get out of that fantasy.

Real relationships of ANY paradigm take some work. Mostly they take honesty and compromise, that I’ve noticed. Be honest with how you feel. You may think “he doesn’t spend enough time with me, he must not like me” but have you actually SAID IT? “I don’t feel like we spend enough time together, it makes me insecure about how you feel about me.” Guess what is possible, even though we rarely see it anywhere BUT a sitcom (which doesn’t do the talking for us, you know.) IT’S POSSIBLE TO TALK THINGS OUT. And even come to an even more satisfying conclusion than if the conclusion you were looking for was storybook perfection. Because the downfalls in all relationships always build depth, so that the good sides can have much more meaning than if the bad had never happened.

And sometimes there are deeper issues causing problems that typical relationship advice does not take into consideration (because relationships can never be uncomfortable, and deeper issues are uncomfortable).

All anyone WANTS to hear is, “if it doesn’t feel perfect, it’s not meant to be”

So we search all our lives looking for the one that makes us feel “perfect”, and since there IS NO SUCH THING in the reality of our human egos, to feel “perfection” it gives us the perfect excuse to avoid working out actual problems.

And when we do find what we perceive to be “perfection” quickly falls apart when our idealizations of one another give way to imperfection and we can’t handle it.

You know what a real relationship is?

Two entirely flawed people making it work.

You put in the effort you wish to receive from the relationship, and you make it work. Sometimes, especially in the beginning or the beginning of a necessary change, this effort is one-sided. If it’s meant to be… You’ll keep on trying.

Fate or destiny or whatever, may be what gives us the opportunity. But we need to take that opportunity and utilize it, fate won’t do the hard work for us. This isn’t sitcom, this isn’t movies. Things CAN “just happen” but then it’s up to you to keep it going, determine whether it is good for you, whether you are ready to put in that work or the time isn’t right, just keep on moving, or go for it. Relationships don’t come with instructions. The simple thing to remember is, all you can do is what’s best for you. And sometimes what’s best, is putting forth the work in order not to lose the best thing that ever happened to you. Because even though every moment may not be perfect, and in fact, as of late, most moments have been worse than the last, you still recognize its purpose in your life. It just opens another opportunity in healing.

If it feels entirely wrong, then walk away.

The fact that neither has, to me, says something big.

The bigger truth is, sometimes it just takes faith. Effort and faith. I like that. Then you’ll find things starting to get easier and flow more smoothly.

Don’t be afraid to look or sound like an idiot and just fucking say what you mean.

Nobody’s perfect. I sound like an idiot all the time.

Now I do it with complete honesty.

I FUCKING HATE NEGATIVE EMOTION

There, I’ve had my say.

Even I didn’t know this was so bottled up inside of me until I started writing this post. Dude.

Awesome.

Have a beautiful day,

Stacey

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Betrayal Of Weakness: Book Five of The Legends of Sangue Available Now!!

Betrayal Of Weakness: Book Five of The Legends of Sangue is now available for purchase here on Amazon.com! Hooray! Thank you, friends and fans!

 

Stacey Katheryn

 

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“To survive, you must tell stories.”

-Umberto Eco

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

thevillagepoetpress  Visit The Village Poet Press

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Book Five Publication Date: 3/3/14!

Seeing how life has kept me pretty busy lately, I apologize for the lateness of the publication for the book due out in January! I had some extra editing to do on it, it is substantially bigger than the other books, so it took longer to finish. Anyhow, I know you will all really love it! It is one of my favorites so far!  Thank you friends and fans! I’ll post links once it’s up on Amazon, on 3/3/14!

Stacey Katheryn

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“To survive, you must tell stories.”

-Umberto Eco

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

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Scared shitless

Because I am nothing but honest with my readers/fans, I would like to share a little story. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared shitless in my entire life. Why?

Well, it’s a long story and I’ll get to that. I was one of those children whose WORST fears when it came to anything social was being in a crowd and not knowing what to do. The feeling that everyone knew what to do but me. Especially if I was being watched or anything was expected of me. There are certain things I have trouble memorizing (sequence, for starters.) The reason I write out-of-sequence, before putting pieces together.

When it comes to acting plays you can see where this may become a problem. As a child I opted out of anything that I’d have to learn rules/sequence (except dance, but even then I ended up joining a troupe of mostly improv moves, subtle visual cues and just learning to trust my fellow troupe dancers and myself)

I always thought if I got into acting, I would suck at improvisation and was always terrified to try. But it’s the monologues I’m having trouble with.

Tonight we had our first “stumble through” of our upcoming play. Not only did I get the impression everyone knew more than I did- They did. They all knew their lines either in part or whole. Yes, as a mystery dinner theatre it’s partial improv with some monologue that we’re allowed to play a bit with. Ok. BUT… I’m a busy woman (no excuse). Let’s try again. I’m riddled with fear (nope, that’s not right either) I rewrote my monologues last night (that’s the truth) and failed to memorize them on time, then panicked and forgot everything I did have memorized (all my other lines, when to come in, last lines of others’ monologues so I knew when to come in- my guiding star. Etc.)

I’ve discovered a lot about myself in this endeavor. 1. I’m learning all about ME. 2. As long as I know WHEN I come in, I can memorize anything I damn want. I always knew that where my efforts of sequence are AWFUL, my skills of memorization are precise, quick, photographic. As long as I know what line to listen for an actor to say, I know exactly where to come in and how. So put the new monologue aside, realizing that’s a non-worry and it’ll be completely memorized by tomorrow. It’s when actors change their lines on stage that confuses me, then leaves me with that “everyone knows what’s happening but me” sensation.

See, tonight I tried to go “au-natural” my term for NO SCRIPT (except my new monologues, one nearby to glance at briefly, the other longer one on a piece of paper to glance at in my hand.) The rest I went over enough to remember where I came in, since my miscellaneous lines are brief and mainly improvised when I speak them. I have nothing against my fellow actors improvising, when done at me I can usually respond pretty quickly. But when they add, forget or change that last line of theirs I had memorized to know where I follow, all is lost, and I’m like… Duuurrr….

Anyway, I am learning to overcome that, along with my childhood fear. I learned: Even if that is the case, nothing bad happened! The world did not end, I did not die, I did not run out of the room, people did not stare at me funny or make fun of me or decide I’m horrible on the spot. I was ok. I am ok. And that’s the best thing to remember.

So moral of the story, Trust yourself, and listen to your inner voice.

You’ll surprise yourself every time.

-Stacey Katheryn

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“To survive, you must tell stories.”

-Umberto Eco

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

thevillagepoetpress  Visit The Village Poet Press (My publishing company)

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The Six Month Plan

World English Dictionary
Business Plan
-n
A detailed plan setting out the objectives of a business, the strategy and tactics planned to achieve them, and the expected profits, usually over a period of three to ten years.

Stacey Katheryn’s Dictionary

Business Plan

-n

A detailed plan setting out the objectives of her business, all in her mind and scarcely scribbled in miscellaneous notes throughout office, the strategy and tactics planned to achieve such objectives to grow and develop her business, The Village Poet Press, into a small yet sustainable company with continual book sales in a period of Six Months.

Writingiswriting

In the essence of this quote, I will tell you why I am waiting six months to publish my next book and putting the focus on my “business plan”.  I hate the term “business plan” don’t you? It sounds all formal and unpromising and demanding. What I have is a solid understanding of exactly what I want this company to be and exactly how I am going to get there. That was all I needed for my massage practice, and it’s flourishing. That was five months ago.

Ah yes, I was going to tell you why. Because it’s summer, because I’m going to be moving soon, because I’m spending more time editing than I am writing, because my living space is being quadrupled as an office space for the business aspect of my practice, and my Village Poet office/writing/researching space and storage space and I am having a very, very difficult time with it. It’s going to reflect in my writing, and to put the best to the test, I’ve had ONE book sale on book four, and that was my best friend Jay (thank you, Jay).

I love my blog, I will definitely continue to blog, but from here I will be pursuing avenues of marketing and business development and essentially, what I’ve done for my massage practice. Hopefully by the end of these six months, I’ll have a readership. Book Five is a VERY important book to the series (and me), and I want people to enjoy it.

Also, once I move and have a bigger space for my writing, I’ll be able to WRITE and not have to worry about all the aspects that shouldn’t be allowed to enter my mind while I’m writing.

So, wish me luck! 🙂

Stacey

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“To survive, you must tell stories.”

-Umberto Eco

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

thevillagepoetpress  Visit The Village Poet Press (My publishing company)

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Of Trust Or Treason- Now Available For Purchase On Amazon.Com!

Now available for purchase, Of Trust Or Treason, Book Four of The Legends of Sangue!!

And as usual, the other novels are on sale for a limited time! Get your copies now!

Blood Of Darkness, Book One of The Legends of Sangue only $1.99!

Murder On Her Mind, Book Two of The Legends of Sangue only $1.99!

and

Destroyed, Book Three of The Legends of Sangue! only $1.99!

Hope you enjoy!

 

Stacey

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“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.”

-Richard Bach

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“Partners In Crime”- Episode 1 (My Day In A Short Noir)

Noir4Awake

And there she was. Woken up again, another day. Just like any other, they may say. A look at the book, putting pants on one leg at a time, using the toilet. Yes, a morning, just like any other.

But little did she know, when that morning passes, there will be an afternoon. A suspicious afternoon. An afternoon to leave chills down her spine.

An afternoon to be suspicious of.

Noir5Window

First there came the call, you see. That strange call. At first she thought… it couldn’t be. A strange woman on the other end, leaving a message. Just like that. Like it was any other missed-call occasion. As if everything was… normal.

But it wasn’t normal.

I mean, who leaves a message in such a way, who? To request a call back but not until… later?

Now that raised her suspicions, you see. Who calls just to say… Call me later.

Even worse…

Call me tomorrow.

Naturally, she thought the worst. A stranger, using their phone, to call, to make a special appointment. An appointment that could mean the difference between… a late lunch, or an early lunch.

noir1

It made her think, as she repeated the message to ensure she had written down and heard every word correctly. Should I call her later, should I call her tomorrow?

The questions, there were just too many.

She thinks about it, as she lights a cigarette and leans against a lamppost in the middle of the night for no reason.

Noir3lamppost

But wait. The meeting. She wonders if leaning against a lamppost in the middle of the night while smoking a cigarette can fit into her schedule well when she has that secret meeting to attend. The meeting of which may contain clues. May contain… answers.

Noir3stranger2

She attends this meeting. There were no actual dark alleys to walk down, but the construction traffic she endured for half an hour was frightening enough to make any cigarette-smoking-stranger filled dark alley in the middle of the night look like a picnic at the county fair.

She enters this building, this maze of a building that once again arouses her suspicion. Who builds their office complex in a circle structure if they haven’t got something to hide? She pretends to get lost. For looks. Just for looks. To scope out the place, you know. To question the local office dwellers, incognito, discover clues. By no means did she actually get lost, that’s just a vicious rumor. Spread by her enemies. Members of the local gang of Massage Therapists that don’t like her style. Don’t like the way she practices… barefoot. They mean to bring her down. She means to discover their seedy secrets and expose them for what they really are…. Chiropractors.

SuspiciousNoir1

But alas, there were no clues to be found, no secrets to unearth. Just a meeting, like any other. Top secret work. Nothing to hide. Nothing…. to hide…

::::Cue dramatic music:::

Until next time, the Massage Therapist, with too much time on her hands, adventures to be had in life. She knows she’ll uncover the truth one day. Someday.

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“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.”

-Richard Bach

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

thevillagepoetpress  Visit The Village Poet Press (My publishing company)

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Life Lessons Learned Hard

You know those moments. The times where something presents itself to you that seems so right. Where you know it is the perfect opportunity. Yes, it’s perhaps a little askew from your original plans, but the opportunities are potential to be endless!

Who cares that you’ve got a little internal debate going inside of you the very moment that opportunity came knocking at your door. Is it right for me? YES! Is it truly right for me? N-… YES!

Only GOOD can come of it.

I’ve been entirely fucked over by this phenomena before. Even now, as I am in the process of personal growth, learning to listen to my intuition and meeting myself from the inside out, even now I am amazingly vulnerable to it. Why? That person seemed so sincere.

I caught myself this time. My conscious still does not yet understand exactly why I said no, and I shall not give it the pleasure of trying. Some things just are. And others aren’t. I recieved the same feeling from this opportunity as the one that got me hanged at the salon. Whether it is because it’s not in my original plans (the ones that are going so well and need not be messed with) or a forewarning to something unpleasant- I listened this time.

My very best advice to you right now. If it seems wrong, even in the most minute miniscule little way, it IS. The closer it came to that meeting, the sicker I began to feel. The moment I nicely called to cancel, I began to feel better. I’m not 100% yet, but that’s probably because I’ve been having this internal debate over the entire weekend.

I feel fortunate that I caught it in time, rather than being screwed over again. This is a type of situation that has presented itself multiple times in my life, it is now time to learn the lesson it was presenting me with. Just because something looks good on paper (so to say) doesn’t mean it is. And shove my ego aside just long enough to let me see the bigger picture, to give me the opportunity to say “this sounds wonderful, but I think I’ll pass.”

Ah, yes, so there we go. Time to go make some dinner, take it easy, and congratulate myself on one more lesson learned in this life. Even if it is a little hard.

Stacey

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“A professional writer is an amateur who didn’t quit.”

-Richard Bach

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

thevillagepoetpress  Visit The Village Poet Press (My publishing company)

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New Characters= Complicated Fun!!

MOHM

It’s been awhile since I’ve talked in any kind of detail regarding my novels. I cannot tell you why, I just haven’t. Now I want to (funny how life works out that way.)

So, my two newest characters (First Captain Aida Mancini and Captain Mario Baldovino) were introduced to my series in 2009 (when I began the rewrites of the whole series, starting with book 1, Blood of Darkness, which was published in April of 2012) I made so many changes from the original books that I found gaps that I needed to fill in, and Aida and Baldovino did so perfectly. That is probably the most grateful change I have needed to make, I love Aida and Baldovino and they have become important aspects to the series.

BUT, it has made things slightly complicated. Being that they did not come into my series until 2009, and I finished with the original copy of book 11 in 2008 (remember, I am rewriting them all). That leaves 11 books they had no parts in. At first, Baldovino was a fill-in character who has become a very integral sub-character, and Aida was originally intended to have a big part in books one and three, and fade from there. I feel almost blasphemous saying so, Aida is such a dear part of the series now. But that leaves me with 11 books I need to change.

How much fun is that??? TONS.

It’s complicated, but it’s fun. And I can’t help but feel these characters were missing from the very beginning. Aida’s quirky bad-ass attitude adding comedic value, Baldovino’s brash hardcore personality adding its own form of comedy as it becomes clear since book 3 just how much he hates the Werewolves.

And the more I write, the more it becomes so obvious that they belong, just as importantly as all my other characters. From the first character I created in 1999 (Alisha) to the turning point in 2002 when I decided Otztal would be my main character, to now, when book four is almost entirely reconstructed and in its final edit before publication, with 9 more books (at least) in the works just waiting to be rewritten and published… It’s been an incredible journey that continues in complicated, fun and amazing ways.

I can’t wait to see how the series continues as I continue to mold it and form it and watch it grow, and be grateful that I can share this experience with all of you 🙂 Thank you, my dedicated fans and readers!

-Stacey

The Legends of Sangue

Purchase books from The Legends of Sangue

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“There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed.”

-Ernest Hemingway

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

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Going Mad

WriteQuoteTuesday3

Ah, my mortal enemy. Writer’s block. But can it be considered genuine “writer’s block” (Not that I believe in it, as you know from previous posts) if I know exactly what I want to write… But not how?

All week long I’ve come up with BRILLIANT ideas, the stuff that BRILLIANCE is made of. (Yes I’m sober.)

But every time I sit down at my typewriter- nil. Nothing. Nada. Niente. Nine.

Why? Good Gosh, I haven’t a clue.

So here is my night in a nutshell before my nightcap.

I make dinner (yum but yawn), watch an episode of Quantum Leap (“Dreams” season 4) get all intrigued and ideas begin to flow (again). Sit at computer (actually, I’m already seated at it). Open Word. Nothing. Get up, dance for an hour and a half to clear my mind. It works. The ideas begin to flow. They build up until I begin to tremble, the sweat pours down my body, my heart is pounding to the rhythm of my desire to write and passion to put quill to paper or fingers to keys is almost too much to handle! I’m going to explode! Hurry up, damnit, Microsoft Word just open the new file! Yes, I want a blank page. Yes I want it formatted. Yes, yes yes, yes YES!

Nothing.

Blog about it.

Still nothing.

Sigh.

Writing does clear my mind, it’s the reason I do it, among many reasons indeed. I rather appreciate a clear mind when I go about my daily business, especially when my daily business IS business, such as today when all I’ve done is reformat, upload, edit, talk to a business development person from the SBA (Small Business Association), come up with a game plan to promote both businesses and myself. Hours spent on what appears to be nothing by the end of the day. Though, Amazon now has updated copies of The Legends of Sangue books 1-3 by Stacey Katheryn through The Village Poet Press. I have some wonderful ideas to work on this business and my Massage business. So I suppose, today was VERY productive.

Today my mind was flowing with ideas as most other days, wishing I was in a place or time to sit and write. I have millions of ideas just floating around in this noggin of mine. So why can’t I let them escape?

I will tell you the one thing I have discovered so far. It’s entirely mental. (But isn’t everything related to writing just mental?) There is something that is stopping my fingers whenever I put them to the keyboard. Now, I am rewording some things, editing my book, prepping it for its June publication (Check out details here: Of Trust of Treason, Book Four of The Legends of Sangue) but I can’t seem to do anything but play with what is already there.

Where’s the new stuff? In my head, silly. Hell, I have entire books planned by now. All I need to do is get past this mental block and get them down.

I have a feeling it’s either going to take an exorbitant amount of alcohol, or an exorbitant amout of chocolate and coffee.

Or Elvis.

“For I can’t help falling in love with you…”

Stacey

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“Good fiction’s job is to comfort the disturbed, and disturb the comfortable.”

-David Foster Wallace

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cover    For more information on my published novels, click here!

thevillagepoetpress  Visit The Village Poet Press (My publishing company)

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