Tag Archives: job

Red Flags for new LMTs


I’ve been a Licensed Massage Therapist for awhile now, I’ve done my fair share of massages and I just graduated school in November. Already I have come across handfuls of “red flags” I feel obligated to warn other new massage therapistsΒ  about (or even ones that have been at it for awhile).

scrubs-personal-safetyAs Massage Therapists, our reputation is shaky at best. The reason being how we’re perceived and portrayed by the media, human trafficking, television and movies, jokes and rumors, society, people who use our titles to cover up that they’re members of the sex industry, treating us as little more than whores.

Rather than the healthcare practitioners we are. Our reputations should be as healers, givers, doing what we do to help improve your mental and physical health. The benefits of Professional massage are astounding. Yet many do not and will not realize that, and will refuse to.

massage therapistRed Flags

#1.Β  When a client calls you and asks you questions such as “Do you provide full body massages”, “What kind of ‘other’ types of massages do you offer” or starts asking you to describe your draping style in detail, “So what kind of draping do you do? Is it fully nude? Is there a towel?” (Yes, I’ve actually had this question asked. )

How to deal with it: In such case as the man asking for ‘draping details’, I told him that I use full draping, in case he was worried, everything is covered except for the body part I am working on, such as an arm or leg. I assured him it was very modest and secure. If they begin asking about your modalities, you can tell them you offer Professional massage dictated by ethical massage standards and according to state law. For fun, I even told him I offer prenatal massage too. This dissuades them and lets them know you are a Professional. If you are uncomfortable with their questioning, DON’T feel the need to “put up with it” or worry you may lose a client or be rude if you say no. Your safety is priority 1 in this business. They say “first do no harm” in regards to your clients, and I agree with that, I took the oath too. But I say, be choosy with your clientele. If something feels wrong, IT IS. You can tell the person, “I am a Professional Massage Therapist, and it sounds as if you are seeking services I don’t provide. Please do not contact this number again.”

Red flag

#2. Clients who say they are only in town that day and need an appointment right away. I’ve been burned by this more than once. If you doubt their sincerity, you can begin asking detailed questions about why they are seeking massage in such urgency. Are they injured, do they have an old injury flaring up, etc.Β  It’s completely your choice whether to accept them or not, but do keep in mind their urgency may not be urgency, but dishonesty, and this can lead to all sorts of trouble. Also, I’ve noticed, that many of these “short notice” appointments don’t show.

frustrated1Red Flag

#3. Multi Level Businesses and distributors. Many people who are independent distributors for a multi level company that sell products such as vitamins etc, find it an easy marketing tool to make one-time appointments with massage therapists and other healthcare providers to give them the opportunity to market their goods. These are usually the ones that make up excuses as to why they cannot book a second appointment by saying they are from out of town, they’ll be gone for a long time, etc. Usually without prompting. They will make excuses for their appointment, rush through paperwork, and make multiple references to their product before going into a full spiel usually at the end of the massage. You are not under obligation to listen to their spiel. They’re not coming to you for help. They’re coming to you for profit. If you find their product interesting and are genuinely interested, then by all means, allow them to engage you in their conversation, etc. Just beware. I was offered a “job” at a salon purely to give the owners more opportunity to try and get me and my fellow massage therapist friend (who found the “job” for me) to buy their products and try and convince us to become distributors (and use me for free receptionist work). A lot of them get commission and extra points/money for talking others into becoming distributors. They never scheduled me any clients, and it was a huge disaster that wasted A LOT of my time.

PyramidSide Note:

Male massage therapists: Keep in mind that all these situations apply to you as well. Do not be afraid to let your client/potential client know you are a Professional, you adhere to strict ethical behavior and expect the same of them. Some female (and male) clients who are looking for the “wrong” kind of service may have more of a tendency to get handsy during the massage than if their therapist was a girl. ALL MASSAGE THERAPISTS: Do NOT, and I repeat, do NOT feel embarrassed, shy, rude, ashamed, or mean to tell somebody NO, to immediately terminate the session, to tell somebody you will not put up with that kind of behavior, to kick them out, etc. It is your RIGHT to protect yourself in ANY way. If they begin to get inappropriate (sexual remarks, innuendos, trying to touch you, intentionally trying to expose their genitals/breasts to you, etc) immediately let go, step back, STOP THE MASSAGE, and tell them their service is done, you expect full payment up front and they are not welcome back. Then step out of the room. DON’T FORGET TO DOCUMENT THE ENTIRE EPISODE IN YOUR SOAP NOTES. That is capitalized because it is dire and crucial to get your side of the story down as soon as possible and in as much detail as possible. Just in case they make false claims against you in retribution, that SOAP note is your savior. Remember: You are a Professional. And ALWAYS trust your gut instincts.

MaleLMTAnd as they say, I got your back, jack. If you’re having issues regarding your clientele, find another massage therapist willing to help you out. Don’t feel alone. Go to an old teacher, mentor,Β  call up an LMT out of the phone book and describe your issue. Come online and find an LMT to talk to. We’re all here for each other. Don’t ever think you have to deal with your Massage Therapy woes alone. We may help people, but it’s important we take care of and protect ourselves as well, and nobody understands that like a massage therapist.

Namaste, and good luck to all πŸ™‚




β€œI became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity”

-Edgar Allan Poe


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Finances, Chocolate Chips and Sake

Here we go. It’s all about the Benjamins, baby. (Hah, wait, I don’t see any bens in these files…) I’m doing my finances. Especially, most importantly, my business finances. Creating expenditure and profit lists, client information lists, that sort of thing. That was last night, I stayed up until five AM doing this.

Tonight, it’s time to catch up on my SOAP notes (Subjective, Objective, Action, Plan) that is legally required following massage.

OMG, this post is so boring I just about fell asleep. Or it could be the Sake. Yum. I came home from my last massage of the day to find an open bottle of Sake sitting out. So, naturally, I helped myself to some. I’m also making dinner. The problem is, I worry that some nice gentle rice wine and curry (do those two often go together? Never mind, I’m going to be done with the Sake far before dinner’s done cooking) will make me drowsy.

And the original title of this blog was not-so-destined to be “Hands Off The Kindle” Why? Because it’s been my go-to device whenever I need a break from life, and it’s become somewhat of a crutch as of late. And guess what, I’ve needed that quite often lately. Sick nieces and sick grandmothers and major life changes and jackass boyfriends aside, whew, I’m a little worried I may be getting overwhelmed.

Then, comes flush that warming feeling deep inside that alcohol tends to provide during times like these, along with the slightly increased amount of erase-and-retypes.

Everyone has a favorite book. Everyone has a book that they read and say, “God I wish I was there.” That speaks to them on so many levels, in so many ways, that you find a piece of yourself in every character, you can relate to the way this person speak, that person acts, even the side characters- hell, sometimes even the enemies- provide you with that little feeling inside of belonging and hope. And that, my friends, is the whole point of stories.

Excuse me, while I ensure my curry is not burning, and add the tomatoes.

Wait, I just answered my own question. Sake DOES go with curry, because I’m serving my curry dish with rice, and Sake is rice wine (the only wine I can stand, by the way)

And in what universe does “My grandmother is sick in the hospital and I may have to go there in the morning and then I work all day tomorrow and I’m busy in the evening, so I will call you on Saturday” equates to “Yes I will drop everything and have dinner with you tomorrow” ? Sorry to say, not MY universe, whether certain people expect it or not. I honestly do not feel that text deserves a reply, so it is not getting one.

Right, yes. The books. The stories. They’re escapes, are they not? To be someone else for just a little while, to live their lives, to follow their stories, their adventures and share with them their emotions and life. I can very easily see how reading can become anyone’s escape, unfortunately, I fear that not enough people nowadays use it as such. More people need to read, is my opinion. Nowadays, people turn to Sake and other alcoholic beverages. The only issue is that I cannot do finances and read and blog and catch up with my SOAP notes and work on story boards and decide whether or not to turn my Legends franchise into an actual publishing company (purely for the sake of easier taxes, perhaps) or not, if I am reading. Which is why I have been reading so much. (You know, doing what you don’t really feel like doing being impossible while reading… Definitely an appeal there…) But it occurs to me simply that I am avoiding a lot of things right now. SOAP notes being the least of them.

Oh dear, yes I know I’m not the only one with issues. But see, my favorite characters’ issues I can share in and not have to take actual responsibility for. But I can live it, and feel how they are resolved, and feel good at the end of the book. Life just isn’t like that.

I am making a dire mistake. I am taking an emotional day and topping it off with Sake and the song “The End of The Innocence” By Don Henley. The last genuine year of my childhood, 1996. After that it was nothing but taking care of the sick and injured and sacrificing my own needs to ensure things and people stuck together. This is the first year I’ve focused solely on me. And even then, I’m not solely focusing on me.

But I remember the sunshine, riding my bike in the bright sunlight and gentle Oregon winds minutely scented with a touch of comforting sea air, the tall grass swaying, the summer evenings of my childhood dipping into soft dusk, then night time, where I would read and assure myself that the sun would rise again the next day. And it always did. As it always does.

What is a one sided relationship anyway? In short, exhausting. Bringing up my favorite (one of) sayings;

“Trying to understand the behavior of others is like trying to smell the color 9”

It brings me great comfort when I find myself stressing and trying to figure out exactly how someone’s mind can take someone else’s tragedy and somehow make it about themselves. And no matter what I do and say, it will always be about them.

No, sorry honey, that’s not how my universe works. And never will it, I don’t have the patience, energy or lack of self-respect to be the minority in a relationship. My world is equal grounds, or my grounds are off limits. The end.

I wonder if I may regret this post come time for me to be less warm inside. Probably not. I’m on the warm side, not yet tipsy, and not desperate enough to become so. Just taking the edge off the planet, is all.

Off comes the edge, in comes the realization that I need to take care of myself. With that comes the brutal point I MUST concede that sleep, right now, is more important than SOAP notes, more important than math and finances, more important than story boards and indecisive decision making. So here is my plan. Put leftovers away. Drink a ton of water. Go to bed.

Hopefully the nightmares will hold off for a night, and I can get restful sleep, and maybe feel prepared for my day this time.

But probably not. Not with everything going on.

At least this is my second to last day at the store. That’s going to help A LOT.

Good night, my dear friends.





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Luckily, dogs don’t judge you when you’re tipsy

Ah, the title of this blog. You may be wondering.

Luckily, I’m not really tipsy, but I did go out drinking with friends and guess what- that was a first for me. No, I’m not calling my friends dogs, I’m referring to the moment I got home all my puppies did was jump on me and ask me for treats, lol. If only they knew.

I’ve never done that before. Never had a girls night out, that is.

What?? You may be wondering.

It’s true.

I found it a rather odd experience, perhaps the natural introvert in me, or the fact that I’ve been fucked over by friends so often that I could only imagine having true friendships with these girls will go terribly wrong (I know, wrong mindset. I’m terrible.) But I couldn’t help but keep thinking… Hm, I should blog about this.

Honestly, one of the things I love to do most in this world is talk to perfect strangers. Smile at them. Say hi. Get to know their likes and dislikes. But when it gets to true friendship- I’m at a loss. I’m nervous, scared even. I can talk to a perfect stranger and have the greatest time- talking to somebody really becoming my friend is unknown. Suddenly, I clam up, I sweat, I sound like an idiot, I don’t know what to say.

And girls. I don’t know how to be friends with girls. I’ve always been a tom-boy who wears the occasional dress and makeup, knows how to be a girl but doesn’t know how to act like a girl. Not modern day girl, anyway.

Boys, exes, clothes, shopping…. I didn’t know what to do with myself.

But the most intriguing part was seeing first hand the mating rituals of the human species, from the female side of it. See, I’ve had plenty of male friends and know how they view the female variation. I’ve never seen it from the female protrayal of the same mating game.

Essentially, the same thing.

Out with a single friend and a dating friend. Single friend looking for some love. Meets the eyes of someone across the room as we walk in. How can he tell she’s single? How can she tell he is? It’s amazing. Maybe it’s a scent we exude, the way we walk, the way we talk, the way we strut ourselves and position our bodies. The subtlty of it all. How the subconscious picks up on these cues so damn fast.

It’s amazing, and something I’m going to have to ponder for awhile. It really is rather an amazing thing.

But congratulate me, for I now finally have true proof that I am a real girl. I went shopping and had drinks with them, lol. Yay! It was fun. Glad to make new friends and get to know others better.

Of course, this is my second slightly alcohol-fueled night this week.Β  I better lay off the booze and get water next time. Yes, I think there will be a next time. I think I can get used to this “social life” thing. Whoever thought I would have such a thing?



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The Twenty Eight Year Old Spinster

There is something stuck in my craw. And I mean REALLY stuck. I can’t dig it out, I’ve tried, so I decided to write about it. Maybe somebody will find some morbid sense of inspiration in it. It’s about career-oriented individuals. With a twist.

There has been an irritatingly common attitude I’ve had to battle for about, oh, ten years now. I realize I should not let it get to me, but it has. Right now, given the horrific day I’ve had, it seems as though the only remedy to not letting things upset me, that I should be able to shrug off and can’t, is to write about it.

What is a career-oriented individual? Somebody who has put all their focus in life into their careers.

The antagonist (by that I simply mean opposite): A family-oriented individual. Somebody who puts all their focus in life into beginning and taking care of their families.

A true mother at heart, though without any living children, I will tell you exactly why I am the former of the two choices. And what kind of shit I get for it.

I’ll start with the shit.

I am a single twenty eight year old woman with no children and nil prospects. I spend my “off time” at my computer, sometimes in pajamas.I drink coffee, I stay up late, I sometimes get up late. I am often treated as irresponsible, unconventional, lazy, uncaring, messy.

Here’s the What’s What and the Why’s Why.

Sometimes perception only goes as far as the mind allows. To see someone at their computer for “hours” or someone who gets up later than you do or somebody who stays in their pajamas all day long sometimes, I may think “lazy” (actually, I wouldn’t) but some people may.

Those people may not take into consideration that I stayed late at work the night before, crawling on top of ten-foot coolers and freezers, moving around boxes of paperwork, climbing up and down ladders, cleaning the whole building, spending a substantial amount of time IN the freezer restocking breads and meats, hauling tons to trash bags and even a fake Christmas tree to the dump.

I’ve been in a multitude of jobs/career potentials. Massage therapist student, CNA, Business owner, a multitude of management positions, I’ve been responsible for the virtues of whole businesses as well as actual human lives. I’ve assisted in resuscitations, I’ve worked 16-20 hour shifts, I’ve been involved in emergency life-and-death situations, some of which my own decisions were the key factor to ending said situations pleasantly. I’ve changed and toileted 65 full grown adults 2-3 times a night, all inflicted with Alzheimers, in between juggling feeding and charting and bandaging and doing full bed changes and baths and running up and down halls 8-12 hours straight night after night, while short staffed and working well past the end of my shift.

I’ve been responsible for business decisions that would affect the whole store, the whole company. I’ve had franchise-wide reputation for being a damn good manager and the one to go to in case problems were to arise- and I wasn’t officially the store manager. But I was given the responsibility of such (not the pay of course). I worked an average of 14-16 hour shifts, 11-15 days in a row at this particular job.

I’ve held multiple jobs. I had two jobs while being a full time student. I worked two jobs while training to become a CNA. While training to become a medication assistant. I worked mega-long shifts in acute care pediatrics- and let me tell you, it’s not easy. I’ve been the sole person responsible for the lives of those I’ve taken care of, infant to a hundred and one, in a number of terrible situations, some of which I’ll never repeat, and not just for ethical reasons.

Not to mention 90% of the time I’m at my computer, I am writing, which, believe you me, is a whole other career, especially now that I am published.


It should be fairly understandable why I take offense in people assuming I am lazy or irresponsible to the point they insinuate I’m not responsible enough to care for their children, ask my why I’m single, tell me “you’ll understand when you’re a parent” when I become concerned that they are so tired and worn out. I’ll understand when I’m a parent?

Try being responsible for 65 people completely out of their mind with brain-degenerative diseases entirely on your own.

If I choose to relax on my “off time” in my pajamas at my computer, working on my stories, then for fuck’s sake that’s what I’m going to do. Because in most cases, I’m tired, I’m sore, I’m frustrated, I’ve only had two hours of sleep thus the reason I’ve “slept in”, and if I want to escape the holier-than-thou attitude of some people I know by staying indoors in my pajamas, I’m going to do it.

Just because I haven’t yet found somebody to treat me well enough to begin a family with, I’m approaching my thirties without a load full of little ones clinging to me, doesn’t make me irresponsible. It doesn’t make me lazy, or childish.

It’s somewhat cute when someone’s young child asks, “Why are you still single?” or “Why don’t you have any kids?” (Because believe me, I’ve gotten this question a lot from a lot of children I know in my life)

But when you consider the fact that they’re only asking because they’ve overheard someone talking about you behind your backΒ  and are the only ones with the guts to ask these questions to your face, that sort of changes that.

I’m a mother at heart. I’ve always wanted children. And I’ll get there. But I’m not going to throw myself at the mercy of the first man willing to lie to my face to get sex and pretend to be interested in having a family or interested in what I’m interested in or pretending to share the same dreams, just for the aforementioned sex, because if I was that type of girl I would have done so long ago. I nearly have. Luckily, I caught my mistakes on time and wisened up. Another reason I’m glad I didn’t start young.

I know it’s cliche to say so, but it holds merit. I’m waiting. Waiting for the right time, for the right guy, for the right moment. But I refuse, I absolutely refuse to waste my life while doing so. If I want to write, publish my novels, work a career or two while I’m at it, keep busy and active and healthy and open to possibility, I’ll do so. Without your judgment and assumptions to make any difference, thank you.

I’ve been asked, What if you wait too long?

I’m only twenty eight, and who the hell are you to judge what exactly “too long” is? I’ve known couples in their sixties and seventies fall in love and marry for the first time. Pay less attention to my life and more attention to yours. I’ll get there when I’m ready. And guess what?

Only I know when that will be.

So, now that I’ve vented, I am going to meditate, relax, maybe have a sip or two of something good and reflect back on the possibilities I do have. There is never nothing there, and never nothing going on. The key is to find all the good you can out of it, and let that positivity open your mind and fill your heart.

Only then can you see a clear path. Have a beautiful day.



By the way, this post goes pretty well with the one above: CNA’s- we’re awesome and we know it


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A Brand New Day

Well, this is going to be quick. Not because I have nothing to say (when have I ever been accused of having nothing to say? Can’t remember…) But because dinner is almost done. I’m beating the timer on the oven, here.
Today is the first day it finally hit me that school is over. It’s time to get on the ball. Time to take the next step into “adulthood” and establish myself as a professional. Spoke to a client on the phone today, wondering when I was opening up my shop. It sounded a little something like, “uh, well first I have to update my insurance and uh, um then I gotta get my license and it should take something like a couple weeks- or uh, somewhere between the beginning of December and the middle….”

Because that SCREAMS “I am a professional, you may trust me!”

I need to improve my phone skills.

Either way, she knows my work and knows my skill makes up for my lack of phone-maturity. I’ve been working (for years) on nixing the “uh”s and “um”s from my vocabulary. Honestly, I hate phones. I need to make peace with telephones.

And oh boy, how in the world did this blog get on to the topic of telephones??

Dinner’s almost done. Gotta cut this short. Moral of the story: We all have room for improvement, so never believe for an instant that you are perfect. Your imperfections make you the beautiful soul you are. Accept and improve upon yourself, we are forever evolving creatures, and it’s our intuition and love for life that keeps us going.

Anyway, good night! (or good morning, or good dinner, whatever)

Oh oh, one last thing. Check out the prologue to my latest: Murder On Her Mind, Book Two of The Legends of Sangue

Even I’m impressed.


Stacey πŸ™‚




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What’s up, dog? (Or is it Dawg?)

Update on my goings-on.

1. Still waiting for an opportunity to video blog. That’s the only reason my videos have fallen by the wayside: work, and I can’t seem to find a time alone to record without all the background noise.


3. I can’t decide between hot rice cereal with blueblerries, and hot rice cereal with maple syrup.

4.My aggravated back went from total pain to light throb with a heinous looking bruise- yay!

5. SometimesΒ  I think men are assholes- but then I think about women being bitches, and I think it comes out pretty even. We’re all insane.

6. I can’t believe I’m at number six already, and I honestly haven’t said anything substantial.

7. I wanted to make smores, but I ate up all my marshmallows.

8. Sometimes I think I wanted peaches in my cereal, then I remember that I hate peaches. Maybe bananas, like my banana blog, Have Some Laughs.

Then I remember all my bananas are frozen. 😦

Have a good day everyone!


P.S. Damnit, I just realized my day off isn’t tomorrow, it’s the day after. OMG, it’s been a long week.


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Careful What You Wish For

I’ve spent the last couple of weeks complaining about not having enough hours at work. Well, the phrase “careful what you wish for” totally applies to me at the moment.

I just got off my second 15 hour overnight shift in a row. Thus the reason I have not had time to write my blogs, and I apologize, for that. I owe you guys some awesome blogs. But I have not even touched a computer recently.

I spent the last 9 hours in the hospital with a client, and I must say, my observations around the place will make for a great blog, when I’m not too tired to write one. So I’m ending this with the promise of a great blog tomorrow, and extra pictures onΒ Have Some Laughs tonight. Thanks my friends πŸ™‚



(P.S. How many times did I write the word “blog” in this blog?)


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Living By Others’ Time

Damn, do I love to move. The work out, the exercise, the activity, the energy, the breath, the love… we could all use more of it, and I do indeed crave it.

I’ll readily admit I go a bit insane if I am unable to exercise on a regular basis, and not just because if I discontinue exercise or put it off for more than a couple of weeks my injury returns full-force and I am out-for-the-mother-effing-count again (for good), but because it just makes me feel alive. And I suspect that’s a feeling we could all use more of as well.

So I’ve been contemplating lately just why nothing seems to work out. Why everything I try fails, and why nothing I do seems good enough, for me or others.

Yeah, I haven’t gotten too far. Mostly I’ve been recovering from bronchitis and pretty much jobless due to a job that has a consistent habit of not giving me hours, and then taking them away at the last minute. I started out this schedule with fifteen hours at the end of the week. Now I’m down to six- with a different client.

I cannot keep doing this. What is going on? Honestly, is there no limit to all the shit in the world?

Evidently not.

And it’s not going to be a picnic finding a job with adequate hours (welcome to the rest of the nation, my dear) but I would like to find one that will at least offer me steady hours (and when I say “steady” I mean that said hours cannot be taken away two hours before I’m scheduled to work them just because a client canceled.)

What have I gotten myself into? I’ve been asking myself that for about 27 years now.

And I find myself contemplating going back to jobs I never should have had to begin with. Whoops, if that isn’t a downward spiral.

There’s still very good chance I will get the job offered last week if I push a little for it tomorrow. Insane restlessness, insomnia and lethargy from the steroids (for BRONCHITIS, mind you) is making it a bit difficult to kick my own ass and get myself going to make that effort to push such a distance as that; especially as I see this past year fly by like a blur and think of all the horrors that went down in the job department and know there wasn’t anything else I could have done to end up here; but… wait, I lost my train of thought.

Oh yes, getting off my lazy ass. I’m going to do so. Tomorrow (I’d do it right now since I’m all pumped up and ready to go after a full workout for once but it’s 1:00 AM so I’m afraid it’s just going to have to wait… yet another example of living by others’ time….)

I’m aware this world narrows down purely to compromise and I have done so with my availability, to the point that it’s harmed me. I promised I would make a commitment to find myself a job with hours I can safely work- though that’s seeming less likely. However, I’ll take what I can get in the efforts of compromise, as long as it’s semi-appropriate. I’m doomed to live by others’ time due simply to the fact that I keep a different schedule than most the rest of the world, and I am utterly infuriated that I am often ridiculed for it, but I try not to let it get to me, despite that someone telling me I need to get up and work in the mornings is like telling the “normal” person to get up at midnight and work through the night day in and day out.

Why, oh why do people have to be so opinionated yet be unable to fully and adequately form a cohesive thought or two and use them to formulate the ridiculously simple equation that no two people are alike, and thus coming to the conclusion that it is absolutely feeble-minded to give somebody grief for not being exactly like them?Β  I cannot change that of which I cannot change- and I don’t want to. And certainly not for the sake of others’ stubbornly ignorant notions.

I think, mainly, I need to get the hell back to work and out of my head, and I need to keep up my exercise routine (particularly the core work) and get myself healthy and pain-free again.

But I think I’m on the up-and-up, I can usually tell by my writing. How? Because I’m actually writing again. I wrote fifteen pages or so last night, a few more this morning, and ideas are flowing through my mind again. Usually when this happens, I know something is about to smooth itself out. Positivity, positivity, think positive.Β  So, whether I get this job, or its comparative inactivity will drive me bonkers or not, at least I’m writing again. That’s a positive sign.

No, indeed it does not pay the bills, feed me, shelter me, clothe me or put gas in my car, but it gives me something to do when I’m up at night (as I rightly should, being that I feel my absolute healthiest at night) still unable to sleep, and nothing but noises in the night and my own restless mind to keep me company. I need to fight off this impending slump and I’m going to do just that. Why? Because I always have.

Exercise, multi-vitamins, water, protein, hope-willing some effing sleep, a little bit of faith and… you guessed it… good old fashioned writing. That’s gonna keep this little girl moving.

And it’s gonna feel great.

Well have a good night everybody, and stay well!


P.S. WordPress, thank you for switching back to your old new post page πŸ™‚


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How to relieve stress in the most improper ways

Because “improper” is rarely wrong.

Ok, I’m going to say this outright. This is the second version of this post, because as I was attempting to “select all” (ctrl+A) and “copy all” (ctrl +C) my assurance that if I have to restart my browser suddenly I won’t lose my whole blog, my chihuahuador began to hump my arm and my finger slipped off the ctrl button and erased everything while I was trying to copy it.

But I suppose that just fits the topic, lol.

Ok, so I just finished publishing my super positive blog post called “Happy New Year” (for all of you who haven’t read it, it’s the one before this outlining what will happen when the alien zombies attack and eat our brains) and I decided it had been a long time since I’ve read my other posts, and I wanted to see how much I’ve changed since May 01, 2011 (the last time I successfully logged in to wordpress.com before this month.) So I began to reread them all. Turns out, I’ve changed quite a bit. Quite a bit indeed.

It seems I was in a somewhat (kind of) better mood then, at least compared to tonight’s mood (yowsers). Which benefited me in the insane way of which rereading those previous blogs put me in a better mood, and I decided to write a better blog. One with some positivity (I’ve been listening to Phil Collins, Kiss and other such stuff to put myself in a good mood the last few hours. Hasn’t worked. Don’t pay too much attention to the artists themselves, it was mostly just cheesy 80’s music I was looking for a good mood within.)

Anyway, now that I managed to find my good mood and some positivity, I managed to realize the biggest lesson I’ve learned in this past crazy-ass year was simply this: The best ways in which to relieve stress. Most of these, in one way or another, I’ve been told are not considered entirely “appropriate” or “proper” so I leave it to your sound judgment whether or not any of these 10 stress relievers might work for you or your health. They did for me.

1. Start a maximum body performance exercise routine such as P90X (or Insanity, if you’re insane)

2. Change jobs 3 times (maybe 4)

3. Start a blog in which to put all your focus, energy and sarcasm into (and don’t be afraid to blog realistically and about other people)

4. Go to a concert with a coworker, and/or a coworker and your manager (the harder the rock, the better)

5. Fuck a Senior Airman (the more often, the more stress relief, trust me on this)

6. Take sexy photos (don’t post them on facebook unless they’re really good)

7. Organize your entire living space (I wouldn’t suggest overdoing this one)

8.Β  Learn to make chocolate coconut bon bonsΒ  (overdo this one a lot)

9. Don’t eat a tea mixture that looks and smells like tropical trail mix (it doesn’t taste that way)

10. Learn to enjoy the little things, find love and companionship whenever you can, and find meaning in everything you possibly can.

So, while I’ve been dealing with a lot of shitty things too, around every corner, these things, in one way or another, have kept me going. Using # 10, I have kept a secret and special place in my heart for all the above mentioned happenings. So even though I don’t know what the future holds for anyone, or what the next few months are going to bring, I will always, always hold a fondness in my heart for Moroccan Mint tea, Rick Astley, and Toyota Tacomas.

And I’ll always hope for the best, for everyone.



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